Category Archives: Marriage

Day 3277 – Ten Years Ago Today, I Got The Best Phone Call Ever

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It was the middle of the night and I received a call. Bret and I had been dating for just over a year. At the time, he had asked me to not call for a few days because he wanted to think about some things. Basically – should we get married or not. When he called that night, I’m not sure I was expecting the question, I was just thankful for a call. It’s not the normal way of things – getting a proposal over the phone, but I love that it is the way we went about things.

The past ten years have taken us to places I never expected or planned to go, but there is no other dance partner I would rather have in this crazy dance.

Happy proposal day B, I’m so glad you asked me the question and I’m so glad I said yes.

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Day 3266 – World Productivity Day!

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Hurray for productivity and a whole day to celebrate it! I love learning about productivity and practicing things that lead to a productive life. There are a number of ways that I’m currently trying to increase my productivity and achieve my goals.

First, Bret and I had a pretty long (over several days) conversation about what a successful summer would look like for us. We started the conversation on Saturday, technically before his summer break from teaching started. What this conversation has done is set our expectations for the summer. We talked about our bucket list of things to do. We talked about daily habits we want to practice. We talked about our work goals.

This morning, I’m a little behind schedule because I finally sat down, wrote out my goals and printed them out. I have a new checklist to highlight daily habits. I printed out all my goals in my January letter as well as some monetary goals (i.e. when I hit this dollar amount, I’ll do/buy/etc something else). I printed our summer bucket list and some of the big names I want to meet. This isn’t necessary for this year, but I want to start keeping those goals in front of me daily.

I also tried something new this morning. I want to get back into running and I’m taking a different approach. Previously, it was all about going for a 5k or following a plan. It was just too fast for the overachiever in me. So instead, I’m setting a “run three times a week” goal. I am only running a very short distance and only increasing my mileage when I feel ready. This is a big shift for me because I’m all about big milestones, but the joy is in the consistency. The different thing I did this morning was pre-prep my food before my run. I scooped my leftover takeout into the microwave, put a bottle of water and peaches on the counter, so as soon as I came through the door, I could start the microwave, grab the water, and recover. It made a big difference for sure.

So a big part of being productive is setting yourself up for success, whatever that means for you.

How are you going to be productive today?

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Day 3264 – Happy International Picnic Day!!

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A very happy international picnic day to you! I hope you have the chance to go on a picnic today! I wanted to share this photo from one of my favorite picnics, which we enjoyed while driving across the country in 2016. It’s a great way to save money on your trips too!

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Day 3262 – We’re Going On An Adventure!

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Today I get to scratch off one of the things on my January letter – Meet The Super Carlin Brothers!

I am beyond words excited about this. It means a day of hanging out with Bret, on his first official day of summer break from teaching. I have watched countless hours of their videos and it will be fun to meet them in person. Here’s hoping they are cool with taking a selfie with us doing the now classic Jen AHHHH face (see below). But just meeting them will be awesome. I love the whole idea of the meetup too. See, their videos focus on theories and various topics about Disney, Harry Potter, Star Wars, Pixar, etc. movies. The meetup? Oh yea, we’re watching The Incredibles 2 together!!!

I have no idea what adventures we’ll find ourselves on before getting to the theater, but you can be sure you’ll hear about it soon!

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Did you like what you read? Here’s some ways you can support us and this blog!
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Day 3260 – Guest Post by My Husband or Advice to Grooms – repost

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As it’s the middle of wedding season, I thought a post about marriage was a good idea! Here’s an oldie but a goodie written by Bret on 6/27/12.

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Since this is a blog about marriage and wedding photography, and Bret is a BIG part of both our marriage AND our business, I wanted to start a weekly guest post from him! If you have any questions for him, let me know and I’ll make sure he answers them!

What was the highlight of the last week in your marriage?
I had a couple highlights in my marriage this past week.
The first is that Jen worked out with me at a nearby park. On the way back, we carried each other as part of the workout. To have a wife that I can work out with and puts up with and doesn’t mind being carried with her butt up in the air with a car honking at her, is truly a blessing.

Another highlight has been finding out that there is a chance we may lose some of our income at a time when both of our cars need work done. When we were talking about it, neither of us was really upset, we just automatically said that we will trust in God whatever happens. That was different from my usual response in a situation like that, so it was definitely a highlight.

Did you learn something new about marriage and/or your wife?
I learned something about myself and my marriage a few days ago. I have been so blessed with a dad that is an example of a husband that I want to be. Jen and I are coming up on 3 years of marriage, and she mentioned that the first and fifth are supposed to be the hardest. I remembered someone saying that Jen and I have had, to paraphrase, an easy marriage so far. I was thinking about how my dad has always told me, despite the situation he was in, that he is commanded to love and stay with my mom. What I’m saying is, and this is kind of an assumption, that he did not go through the situation and grow in love, and is now able to say that he truly loves her, or now knows they can make it through thick and thin, or that he has enough experience now to say he will not leave her. I believe he has had his mind made since he said “I do”. And that is how I feel. For my part, I meant “till death do us part” unless for reasons of infidelity and Jen and I have discussed this. Some may say, “yeah but you don’t know the future. You or she could change.” I can’t make Jen love me, but I can choose to love her and stay with her, despite the situation. Surely some people really can mean it. I really do believe that love is a choice. I hope I do not sound conceited. On the contrary, I feel our marriage must be harder for Jen, than it is for me. I don’t know how she puts up with me sometimes.

What’s your advice to grooms this week?
Every time someone asks me how long we have been married, and I tell them, they are like, “oh, you’re still newlyweds”, and make some comment like I haven’t hit the real marriage yet, or like I’m still in for some rough waters, or they try to tell me how women are, or make a comment that shows they believe divorce is an option. And I’m like, don’t condemn me. Why would I even want to talk to someone about marriage, who believes divorce is an option? I want to talk to people who will support not me, not my wife, not even our happiness, but our marriage. I want someone like my dad who will tell me, “It doesn’t matter if you are poor, or unhappy, or if you think they got ugly, you made a promise to them and God. You are supposed to stay with and love your wife.” The world always tells us to do what makes us happy. But God’s way is actually the opposite. It tells us we must die to self, love our wives as Christ loves the church, giving himself for her. So what is my advice? Don’t even let divorce be part of your vocabulary.

Bret’s quote of the week:
I heard this somewhere: Marriage is not only intended to make us happy, but to make us holy.

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Did you like what you read? Here’s some ways you can support us and this blog!
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Shop on Amazon (no additional cost to you, this gives us a percentage of what you order).
Check out our resources page.
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