About 365 days of marriage

I started this blog in April of 2011. At the time, Bret and I were wedding photographers and it was a way to share how marriage is more about the day to day and so much more than the wedding day itself. For about 5 years, I blogged about the joys and sorrows of the Christian walk, marriage, work, family and friends. I’ve blogged every day since a few weeks after I started. In May of 2015, we photographed our last wedding. Now, I have become passionate about simplicity, particularly in marriage, Christianity, business, travel and life. For a number of reasons, we have become minimalists. I’ve found that having simplicity makes life so much deeper, refreshing and joyful. I hope that this blog will help others see the benefits of living simply.

Day 3336 – Reflecting On Our Near Death Experience Nine Years Ago

Posted on August 29, 2018 by 365 days of marriage

I’ve shared my full story of our near-death experience before, so if you haven’t read it, check it out here. But today I wanted to talk about the lessons I learned through it, since it, and how it still impacts my life.

For the last 20 years of my life, I have been met with much young death. The ages ranged from about 18-30ish. I’ve attended a lot of funerals. The shortness of life has been within my radar for my entire adult life. Dating Bret also kept it in my view. Honestly, I don’t know if I could have handled having this person I loved deployed to a literal war zone without these experiences.

So reflecting on how close we both came to death that day on the river, I think these things.

– I am never ever ever ever promised tomorrow or even the next second, so I better enjoy the time I have.

– The little things that bother me and stress me out on a day to day basis are so small compared to the scope of my life.

– I let go of the things I need to let go of and hold onto the things I need to hold on to.

– I am much more honest about the things I need and the things I don’t need.

– If I want to wear a Batman shirt with a cape, I do it.

– Even if I’ve made countless mistakes, I can make a difference by sharing those mistakes.

– I live without regrets. While in a lot of ways, I could point to a number of things in my life that I regret. I could say, wow, this situation is NOT what I wanted to happen, I would change THAT for sure. But I’ve learned that everything that has happened in my life has brought me to the person that I am today. And honestly, I really like that person, and I also can’t wait to see who that person is down the road….however many miles I have left on it.

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Day 3335 – Don’t Negate The Small Things You Say

Posted on August 28, 2018 by 365 days of marriage

I’ve realized recently that even super small, off hand comments can have a deep impact on someone else. I also recognized that it’s ok to repeat yourself. I watched a video a week or so ago that completely changed my thoughts on my reading goals this year, just by a brief comment the speaker made.

I had multiple people comment about a post that I just kind of threw together.

Sometimes I’ll sit in front of the screen, trying to figure out what to write on this blog. It can be hard some days to find the motivation because, at face value, this blog doesn’t really bring me much income. Yet, it is something I devote time to every day. I show up, no matter what.

I come back every day for several reasons. This blog is a creative outlet. I can toss out whatever the heck I want, and see what sticks. I’m often surprised by the things that speak to people (I’ve said it before, but I wouldn’t be writing a book about my drinking if it wasn’t for this blog). I find the things that I am truly passionate about (I’m looking at you travel). I can share something that’s important to me and even though we look at it differently, is important to others.

So as you’re talking to people, whether through your social media posts, in person, or however else you talk to people, remember that even the tiniest comments can have a profound impact on someone else.

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Day 3334 – Why On Earth Do I Get Up At Five A.M. And Why Am I Excited To Do So?

Posted on August 27, 2018 by 365 days of marriage

Last week, I was in a discussion about wake up times. Upon hearing mine (five a.m.) my friends asked a valid question “why would you do that???” It’s a good question. As someone who loves sleep, sees the need for getting enough sleep and would sleep in every day if you let her, I never thought I would enjoy getting up at five.

But as I reflected on last week, with the busyness of the real estate business, my desire to build a new business, and you know, keep my sanity, I realized that a big part of why I can fit everything in is waking up early.

My morning routine has changed a little bit over the last six months. I’ve added things in and cut things out. Here’s a snapshot of my current morning.

5:00-5:10 – get up, entreat Bret to start the coffee, whether through verbally asking or by sending him a GIF of someone pressing a button. Once I started prepping the coffee the night before, it made getting up so much easier since all I have to do is press a button.

5:10-5:30/6:00 – have coffee with Bret while he stretches. He used to stretch at other times, but changing things up and combining our coffee date with his stretching has really helped us to maximize our time.

5:30/6-9:00ish – the timing of this section changes depending on what we have going on and how late the coffee date went.

Devotions – I’m systematically going through the Ask Pastor John podcasts. I’m also doing the Discipleship Journal Bible Reading Plan to read the bible in a year.

Journal – This is one of those things I keep telling myself I HAVE to do because I do look back on what I’ve written. I love being able to see what I was going through a year ago and how much I’ve changed…or still need to change. I’ve started to track this on my highlighted checklist and have had a streak of eight days.

Morning reads – I work through three different books at a time. These tend to be more about my work life. I’m currently reading a book about real estate investing, a book about profit, and a book about creativity. I love that even if I can’t read later in the day, I’ve got some reading in.

January Letter/Contract – I read my January Letter and my contract with myself about my new blog out loud, every day. Hearing myself say these things has been very important. I’ve also made some modifications as the year has progressed. Where once it read “I commit to not say ‘I can’t afford it,’ ‘I should just quit,’ or ‘I can’t make money’.” It now says “I say ‘I can afford it,’ ‘I won’t quit,’ and ‘I make money’.”

Courses – I’m working through Pinterest Traffic Avalanche and Make Money Blogging For Beginners by Create & Go (check out my post about my experiences with their first course if you have any interest in starting a blog). I also added a travel hacking course into this portion of the day.

Writing inspiration – While we were traveling to Boston, I had a realization about what my inspiration is for sharing about travel. I wrote that out and read it while listening to a song that really touches my soul about travel. Sometimes I’ll watch a video I put together of us traveling to really get into the mood.

Write for TJFZ – After I find myself in that mood, I start writing. As I’ve been adjusting my workday for all the new things I have to do, I realized I had too full of a schedule on my new blog. So I’m reverse engineering it a bit. I’m seeing how long it takes me to do everything I need to do for a post, from writing, to posting, to creating other social media content. Then I’ll have a better idea of what’s a good time frame/schedule for where I am now with other commitments.

Write a post for 365 – I have to say, showing up every day for this blog has made such a profound impact on my life in countless ways. I’m so thankful for EVERY one of you who read my posts, whether every day, every few weeks or just once. Knowing that I have an audience for what I say is just amazing.

Workout/shower – If I’m lucky, I can squeeze in a run before Bret leaves. Sometimes it’s a workout done in the apartment.

On a good day, I’m done all of this by 8:30 a.m. What’s great about that is I’m able to mentally turn off any thoughts of “Oh, I should work on my blogs, oh, I still need to work out, etc.” I’ve taken care of things that are important to me – my spiritual growth, my personal growth, my health, and my businesses. I’m able to jump into my work day knowing these important things are done. I’m thankful I’ve cultivated a strict morning routine for so long because now that I’m adding in so much, I can still fit it all in. It was a huge deal once the real estate workload increased.

I am now SO happy to get up at 5 a.m. and am so thankful for what I can do because of it. I never thought I’d say it, but I don’t snooze anymore and I actually get up pretty excited.

What time do you get up?

Editor’s note: This photo was taken when I forgot to post a few years ago. This is not an actual representation of us when we wake up. 😀

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Day 3333 – Reflections After Our Seventh Real Estate Investing Closing

Posted on August 26, 2018 by 365 days of marriage

When Bret started with real estate investing, I saw it as “his business” we’d chat about things like a husband and wife chat about their “day” jobs. Fast forward a few months and I started doing some administrative tasks for “his business.”

Then a few months ago, things shifted. We started to say “our business.” We talked about how we could ramp this up with our partners.

On Friday, we closed on our seventh property. To say that I never expected this would be our life is a bit of an understatement. My vision of what my life would be has changed so much over the past decade it almost makes my head spin to keep up. The biggest takeaway I’ve had is that it’s completely ok to change your work dreams…even every few months.

Because of us ramping up our business, we knew that our volume would increase across the board. From marketing output to appointments to calls to paperwork. As we were looking at things, the incoming calls were the biggest concern. Without ANY pressure, Bret asked if I thought I could help with calls. This was actually a pretty big ask because, to be honest, I’ve had some issues about being on the phone. We’re talking I would sweat and shake when I would call a place just to ask when they close (the reasons for this are long, drawn out, and not worth the story).

If he had asked this a year ago, I would have said, no way, nope nope nope! Keep me behind the computer, that’s my strength! But because of a number of experiences over the last few months, I knew it was a challenge that would stretch me and grow me and make a big impact on our business. The whole “if you want to be in a place you’ve never been before, you have to do things you’ve never done before” was ringing in my head.

This week, I did things I’ve never done before in our business. The first day I took calls was when Bret started back to school. We received about double the amount we’d received in the past, it was a crazy huge amount of calls. At the end of the day, I felt humbled that me taking a few hours out of my day could help us so much. The folks I spoke to were kind and it wasn’t a horrible experience. There are still a few kinks to work out, but I feel a lot more confident.

Friday, while Bret was busy at work, I did a bit of driving around (over 100 miles) for the business, which included doing a walkthrough of a property we were closing on later that day. As it turned out, this property was seen by all of our partners, so sitting around the closing table with everyone was a really neat experience.

After the closing, we went to eat with our partners. The place we chose was next to another restaurant we visited with them. What was a little surreal was how different things were compared to that previous meal. The previous meal took place about a month after Bret started working on building the business. At the time, it was still “his business” and not “our business.” I wasn’t listening to the conversation as much and didn’t feel like I had much to say.

But now, this has become OUR business so much more deeply and meaningfully. I can’t wait to see how this next stage of our business grows and changes us. I have to say, I really did miss working with my spouse. 🙂

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Day 3332 – A Very Happy Birthday To NPS! – With A Few Pics Of My Favorite Parks

Posted on August 25, 2018 by 365 days of marriage

I absolutely love our national parks. We’ve visited so many and I’m so thankful for the work that goes into maintaining them and providing so much value to travelers from around the globe. I can’t wait until I can say “I have visited them all!”

Here’s a few from our absolute favorites around the country.