Day 3167 – No Movies With Nudity – What’s That Like Practically?

I’ve talked about not watching movies with nudity in the past.

When I look into a movie to see if it has nudity or not, I check out IMDb and Plugged In. Sometimes I can get a good answer on IMDb but the details are user generated, so I have to wait until after the movie is in theaters. Plugged In is very detailed in what happens, what’s shown, and what topics are covered in the movie.

A few nights ago, something popped up in my online scrollings about Ready Player One. Dude, I LOVED the book so much that I read it twice. I’ve been super excited about the movie. So I thought, let me see if anything has been posted yet about the content. Oh friends, what disappointment was I met with when I saw in the rating itself – partial nudity. Now, I have NO idea what this entails. There is some adult content in the book, and I could see nudity being present.

When I mentioned this to Bret, he mirrored my disappointment (as he read the book too on my prompting) but he said something that really struck me and reminded me why I don’t watch nudity.

Jen – ugh, it’s probably just a funny butt shot or something.
Bret – Isn’t my butt enough for you?
Jen – That THE whole reason why I don’t want to see nudity!

See, one of the bigger reasons I don’t watch nudity is because I want my mind clear for only Bret. I mean, even Jesus cautions us:

“You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’ But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart. If your right eye causes you to sin, tear it out and throw it away. For it is better that you lose one of your members than that your whole body be thrown into hell. And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. For it is better that you lose one of your members than that your whole body go into hell.
Matthew 5:27-30 ESV

I want to take Jesus at His word and cut out my eye (not watching nudity) so there is less temptation to lust after someone who isn’t my husband. My marriage is much more important to me than watching the latest movie.

We’ll see what this partial nudity turns out to be and if I’ll actually watch it, but at the end of the day it’s just not worth it.


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Day 3166 – Five Years Later, I Think These Rings Have Stuck – or – The Importance Of Wedding Rings

Five years ago today, I gave Bret his 5th, 6th, and 7th wedding rings, he still has them today. He has worn these rings more than half of our marriage.

Over the years, I’ve joked with him about losing his rings and gave him a hard time that he said this set is so important because it was mine. But I realized something recently – all of the other rings were purchased cheaply or without his knowledge. While the ring I placed on his finger the day we were married was important and special, it was just a symbol. Our marriage is not held together by rings. But this ring set was the most important of the lot, because in Bret’s mind, it was a piece of me and now I see it as a piece of Bret. It’s the whole “one flesh” thing, in ring form.

Here’s to another five years with this ring Bret!

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Day 3162 – I Really Am Thankful For Traffic Jams – repost

As I’m gearing up for my solo-cation (I leave TOMORROW!) I’m thinking about potential traffic I’ll run into (don’t worry, I’ll share all about where I’m going after the fact). I’m hoping to leave right after I drop off Bret at school, so I’ll be hitting traffic somewhere, I’m sure. I truly think about the following story most times I’m traffic (especially on I-95, which is the road Bret was on).

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Originally posted 10/2/2012
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Today, I had bible study in the morning in Joppa Maryland and then had to drive all the way over to Hunt Valley to grab lunch. It was raining a little, so I wasn’t sure how timely I’d be….and I actually got stuck in a traffic jam about half way.

A little back story….you may or may not know the full story of how Bret and I met….well, I won’t share that now (you can ask me later)….but a BIG part of the story is that on his drive from Quantico, VA (where he was for training) to Bel Air, MD (where I was), he wanted to turn around. It is a long drive. But then he looks over to the other side of 95 and there was a parking lot of traffic for about 10 minutes….and he said, ah, guess I’ll still go.

I try to remember this whenever I’m in traffic….and think….someone’s life may be changed forever because of this traffic jam….this is where I am now and I have to just deal with it.

While I was sitting there, in the traffic, I thought about it again….and I said, you know, I am content to sit in this traffic….and I realized that I truly meant it. It was so moving, it made me cry.

So, I challenge you to think about situations in your life that are like a traffic jam….they may be happening for a bigger purpose. But if not, you can grumble about me and traffic next time you hit a jam.

The following picture is about 4 months after I met Bret…who I met because of a traffic jam….and a friend who knew us both better than we knew ourselves.

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Day 3159 – How We Continue To Stay Out Of Debt, How We Have Money Saved, And How We Had Extra For Taxes

If you would have told me 10 years ago that I would have a three month emergency fund, that I would be debt free for almost five years, that I wouldn’t get anxious when paying bills, and that I would get excited about taxes, I probably would have called you crazy.

I came into our marriage with about $30,000 of debt. This was from reckless spending, big purchases, starting a business on credit cards, and having to pay for necessities on my credit card while using all my cash paying for things for my DUI. Ha, if you also told me 10 years ago I’d be 100% ok talking about getting arrested and talking about my drinking problem, I would have called you crazy….and been super embarrassed that you knew I was arrested.

Through Bret working like six jobs, me working two jobs, extra money coming in because of the GI Bill, and very strict budgeting, we were able to pay everything off less than four years into our marriage. Since then we’ve stayed out of debt and have been able to save. Our savings accounts have fluctuated over the past few years. At one point we did have six months saved, but gave a bit away and went on a few adventures.

So what have we been doing since then that I was actually excited and not stressed at all about our taxes?

Here are a few things:

Since well before I was married to Bret, I kept a detailed spreadsheet that showed my income and expenses for 1-2 years into the future. I can see what times of the year will be harder than others (right now that’s the summer since Bret is paid on a 10 month schedule at his day job), I can see when we would have to dip into savings unless we made an adjustment, and I can quickly see how a change in expenses will change things for the rest of the year (and into the next). But this approach has some disadvantages and doesn’t show the full picture.

To get a very detailed picture of how we spend our money, we got an account on mint.com. It’s a free service that connects to all of your accounts. You can set up budgets for all areas of your life and get notifications when you’re getting close to a budget. When we first signed up, I was shocked to see how much we spent on gas. It was much more than I thought we spent. What I love about mint is that is shows a very real picture of how things are….not how you want them to be. It has limitations too, for sure. Just yesterday, I was told I was over budget for home insurance because I paid the balance in February instead of April. I know I have the money there, but mint wants to show me a big red in that budget. This is why it’s been helpful to use several methods to track our money and budgets. One thing I didn’t know I could do until recently was actually split receipts. So if I go to Walmart and buy groceries for us but also some notebooks for my business, and supplies for our business, I can split it in mint.

Before we got our first check for the real estate investing business, we decided how to divvy out the income. 30% goes right back into the business, whether this is a larger budget for the next few months, or to help us get through summer months. 32.5% goes into our savings account. 32.5% is saved for taxes. 5% is for celebrating/travel/etc. Because of this method, we were able to have money set aside for taxes. So there was no anxiousness for when the bill came to both pay our accountants (who we LOVE by the way), or even if we had to pay the government. Because the money was there, for that purpose. It was a totally trippy feeling, but very very cool.

The next thing we want to work on is having a good idea of if we’ll owe or get money back. We don’t want to go into our tax season wondering what’s going to happen. I mean, we had this money just sitting in an account waiting. If we had known what our taxes would have looked like a few months ago, we could have invested that money back into the business sooner.

And I’ve heard some businesses use things like boats to save on taxes, so….life goal? 😀

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Day 3158 – Our Epic Day Off

We were completely surprised by the day off on Friday. Just the fact that Bret had off school and I had a lighter to-do list would have been enough for a great day right there. But as things progressed, it just got better. Later in the morning, we received word that we would not owe on our taxes and would be getting money back. We saved a percentage from each of our real estate investing deals, in case we did have to pay. So we found ourselves with money to reinvest in our business and ourselves. I was SO siked because it also meant that I would be able to stay the night somewhere for my solo vacation, which I will be taking next weekend.

At this point, we did another happy dance, and promptly decided it was a good day to have ice cream for breakfast.

As the day progressed, I realized that wasn’t the best of ideas (I’m slightly lactose intolerant), I ate some healthy foods for lunch, but dinner was a different story…

We finished the day with Harry Potter and a ton of junk food. It was a truly wonderful day.

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Did you like what you read? Here’s some ways you can support us and this blog!
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